You will not be able to find this in a middle school health textbook, and I doubt you will find this in any medical school book, either.  So, plan on doing a cut-n-paste on your computer with this wise teaching, and place it securely in the file on your screen that says:  STUFF TO BE AWARE OF.

For women, especially Southern women, there are just 3 levels of the health hazard of perspiration.  I feel it is my duty to warn,…rather, teach,…you all about this revised health information, because my version is tested in real life, and my definitions are much more accurate than any you have seen before.

1.  Glow.  Glowing is the first level of “heating up” and where women can still maintain their dignity while in this stage.  If a woman is told she is “practically glowing,” it is meant to be a compliment.  For example, women in love, pregnant women, a woman who is a bride – they all can glow.  No beads of water pop out on their heads, but there is definitely a pronounced, if not mysterious, aura about this person that says good things about her.  She is most likely in a great stage of life and it shows on her face.

2.  Glisten.  The woman who is observed as beginning to do a little more than glow, where a shine actually emanates from her face as it begins to become moist with perspiration, is known to glisten.  There has been a saying for years that we Southern women use when we deny that we are actually perspiring and just say, “We don’t sweat, we just glisten.”  Sounds much prettier, doesn’t it?

3.  Sweat.  This is the level of perspiration that we women often reach, and it happens to coincide with the attitude of our stage of life where we just don’t care that you know we are human and we sweat!  Not only do droplets start to form on our nose and forehead, but we also are mopping streams of saltiness from our hairline, neck, chest, and beyond.  We have gone way past putting up a brave front and we don’t care that our temporary hair dye job is running, or that our makeup is streaking.  We just wanna get cool!  And we will fan, put ice down our dresses, and show shameless disregard for our loved ones by even going to the freezer and sticking our heads in.

Afterward, when the sweating ceases, we will turn around to those who had witnessed any portion of the “race for the coolness,” we will look them straight in the eye with the look that can kill, and proceed to smile and say, “What?”, like nothing ever happened.  Like you didn’t see what you just saw, like our loss of dignity was never in doubt, and you had better go to the same place of denial that we have.  Never, ever speak of it again

-by Carol Caffarel

Entrepreneur, Corporate trainer,professional speaker, writer who believes in the value of strengthening one’s professional presence and personal brand value.

Carol is the owner of Presentation- Southern Style, and is a Team Member here at “Simply” Sue Speaks! To have her at your next event simply fill in the contact page on this site. “We bring the “WOW” factor to your next event!”







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